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The Top Secret Spy Mission

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The Top Secret Spy Mission

Post by RKRobot on 2/5/2019, 4:46 pm

Using a Randomizer and a couple hours of my time, I was finally able to crank out a BadFic of my own.  This is for everyone's enjoyment!  There are few characters in here that are not mine, but because this is a parody story, do not fret over misrepresentation!  I hope you enjoy reading something stupid, because that's what I was prepared to give you.  ^_^  Thanks for reading!



It was a drak and stomy night and ligtning struck the trees so bad the split in half and caught fire even though it was riaing.  On top of a tall mountan, a castle that looked kind of like a scientist lab stood tall and kinda crooked.  Half of it was sticking out of the side of the mountain, while the other half pierced the skies and its spire poked through the clouds.  The lighting semed to be drawn to it, like moth to a lantern.  Sometin bad was happening up there...

Ikari cocked her gun and then readied it at Kane.  He was a big boi so he wasn't going to be easy to miss.  She spat on the ground and blood was there instead of spit and she said to him in a angry voice, "The gig is up, Dragon.  My praters killed everyone else by now so its just you and me all by our selves."

Kane grred and slammed his clawd fist into the wall, making a big dent in it.  Ikari was not scarred theough.  She trained like this for most of her ligfe and ever since she was a little girl she wanted to grow up and learn how to use a plasma rifle and kill people with it because she thought iwas cool and edgy.  Now that she had her very own plasmarifle she used it erryday and even slept with it next to her when she goe to bed because she love it so much.  Anyway Kane got mad and threatneingly said, "You fool, you haven't even scrateched the surface of what poser i posses!"

Kane quickly run over to the lab tabel filled with beakers anad science bottles and tubles and flasks and books and computers, and it was a very big table so it could fit all this stuff on it, so anyway he grabbed some botle with a round base and it had a label on it that said 'h8trs g0na h8t' on it.  So he waved it around and inside was a sloshy green and blue liquid that bubled up some like soda and Ikari looked confuseded.

"Gonna soup of cide?" she said with a chuckle and grined, pointing her gun at the bottle now so she could stop him from doing something really dumb.  Kids dont ever drink weird lab chemicals cause its bad for you and you might be dead.  Kane made a hearty laugh and his belly jiggled when he did so.

"Yor patheitc, Ikari, trying to be a hero.  You couldn't even chage the future and you failed your mission because onec i drink this!  i will be unstoppable!" So he laughed again and engulfed the entire bottles workth of liquid and then he burped and fire camped out his mouth!  Ikari couldn't wait any longer so she shoot at him and he cuked just in time.

he then get up and ran behind the big counter with all the stuff on it and so Ikari keep firing at him, breakin gall the glass on top and exploding the computers with her rifle, loading it with her own strange plasma powers in her speical gray wrist-rings.  She keep trying to kill him but like i said it was a very long table and he was hidin from her even though glass was blasiting everywhere around him and probably cutting his scalye flesh up badly.

Then she heard a noise and it was Kane gunting and growling like he was in really bad poin.  Maybe one of her shots bounced off the wall and shot him and killed him?  So Ikari ran around ecitedly because her missiong might have been a success but no!  She was wrong because when she went to look for him he suddenly ripped thorugh all his clothes and became super big and dragon like - moe so than befoe!  He was like 20 feet now with big veiny wings and a longer tail and he had horns and spikes all around his head and back like a dinosaur staegosauraus thing.  He roared and it sounded like a lion because we dont have any dragon noises in our special affects library.  Big Dragon Kane lookse around and his eyes open and they are red znd scary.  He look at Ikari who is pissing herself with fears and grip her gun tight as if it will help her with comfort and feelings like an actual person.  He roard in herface and tried to bite her!

Ikari jump back and run away, but Kane was chansing her down, stoping on the floor wth his massive dragon feets and claws.  his wings flapped so hard it broke everything in the room and his tail swung it dented the steel walls.  Ikari rand down the sprial stairs out of the top laboratory and reached the floor undersneath.  She called on her communicateor to her partners and yelled to them, "Get out now!  We have a situation and its really bad!"

"What kind of situation?" Xanthos repleid skeptically.

"She just said its a rally bad one," Luna returned sassily.

"Can you not fight about what i just said and do sas your told?!" Ikari screamedly at them, making them both say 'Roger' and then Ikari said "Idiots, that's not my name!"

Kane crashed down the stairs and landed on the same floor as Ikari, still screeching and wreecking his own science castle.  Ikari docked into one of the smaller wrooms with boxes everywehre and called her pranthers again, in a wisper.  "I'm on the second top floor and Kane is being a destructive asshole.  Does anyone near the copter yet?"

Luna's commnicator staticked and then she said back, "not yet, I'm looking for the keys.  I think I left them back in the castle bathroom."

Ikari slap her head and be disappoint.  Then Xanthos said "No I have them!  You gave them to me because you were afrid to lose them!"  He even jingled them over the communicate so that was his proove.  He says to them, "I will go get copter and you escape and then we can blasted Kane from the air and kill him for good!"

Jus as Ikari was about to aree to his idea Kane cam along and breath fire all over the room she was hiding in and all the boxes were on fire now!  Ikari get to the corner of the room and try to hide but fires lick her legs and drool allover her feet and she get hurt and burn and ouch!  So she desperately charge thu the fire and out the room and stop drop and roll to put herself out.  Kane was there and ready to crunch her into pieces, but she roll out of the way and shoot at him in his face and he got blasted and hurt by her plasma attack!  She then aims for his eyes and shoots him until he become bind and he roar again but this time with pains.

Ikari notic the fire spread was on high, and she run away, but it was getting hot in here and she did not want to take off her clothes because she loved tuxedos.  Sudenly she was got chills because ice ans snowas now comng in and then she look up and sawed Luna come back inside to help her!  Ikari hi five Luna, but almost in the face because she told her to get out, but Luna disobeyed her and there would now be dishonor on her and her family.

"Ur dumb and i'm gonna report you for insginificant msibehavor and trason, but you did just come in time so i don't maybe can be persuded to change that for you~" Ikari teased her partner and Luna then take her hand and run out of the castle lab as quickly as they could!

Xanthos was on point with his arnival and he lower a roep latter so his pratners can come abored.  The lab caslte on the mountan was crushing all aroun Kane but then amidt all the smoke and fire and rain and lightnin they see a big figue come at htem!  It Kane and he flyin!  Using he big wings he flewed up to the copter and breathe fire all on the teem but Xanthos flied away so he technically missed.

"Acitave Plot Armor!" Xanthos shouts and press a button on the copkit dashbored.  He get a big green sheild around the copter and now Ikari, Luna and him were safe from Dragon boi.

Kane mad, so he goes and charges them into the side of the montain and their sheld breaks!  Luna screm and say to Ikari she had to shoot now so they can get awoy.  Luna build an artifical shild made of ice arounmd the copter while Xanthos got the contrals back to normal.  They flyd away from the mountain so they didnt crash anymore, but Kane cchases them becuz even thou he was blind he culd smell fear, and fear leads to anger, and anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering.

Ikari aim good at the monster and then she have flash back to the first time she held her gun and she focus her energy all intisde it and feel strongeth.  Stonge than she evar felt before!  One battle cry later and she blasted thro the opening Luna left in her ice sield and shot Kane ded on and into his open firey moouth!  He ated the blast from her plasma and he exploded in a big orange and green blast and it knocked the troi out of the helpicopta and they all fall down!  Itwas the ocean under them so they thought they would be okay but then they realzd theat they don't have safety life fests on!

Luna try to freeze water, but Xanthos said if she fereeze water they crack their skulls on it and die harder with a vengeance, so Luna did not do that.  Ikari turns to them in the air and sais, "Goodby my frinds and even tho I thonk you both studpid you are importent to me and halped me a lot of times and I atcually kinda liek heaving you aground!"

They said "Aww and we lurve you too Ikari" and then they all plummit into the dark waters and think they drwon to deth.

It did not take long time to find the messing scret angetns and git them back to HQ.  Agnet Catia and Agetn Spirit finded them only a hour later flooting on the waters.  They pick them up and take them to hospitale where they become better real quick and are able to tell this stroy to others and reprot it to teh boss.

"We so glad to find yous" Catia says to the treeo asfter listen to the story.  "Its like we new we had to help you so we come here at the right time!"  She wage her tail happy.

Spirit mkae a smile on his face and feel good abut his job.  "We follew our got feeling.  That is what makse us good at recsue agenets, after al!"

Ikari sigh, recluctant to say they wer right.  "Yeah yeah, but we was the ones who defated Kane the eval sceintist!"  She turn away and huff and fold her rams over her cheast.

Erryone laugh and all has a good time bein a serect agent and are go aon missin togetha!

TEH EDN.

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RKRobot
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